It’s funny because you hear about people having these emotional releases, releases that are often times seemingly unfounded, and you can’t imagine how it must feel. You have to realize that something as simple as a photograph, a song, a yoga pose, a brush stroke- they can all trigger this surge of emotion through the human body. I think that this is how you know that you feel and understand the effects of art. It’s not something visual or tangible or auditory, it’s the impact that the sense has on the mind and on the spirit. I remember a few weeks ago when I went to the MET in New York for the very first time and I cried twice. Once was when I walked into a room full of Van Gogh paintings, and the other time was during a 30 minute meditative film sequence titled “The Refusal of Time” by William Kentridge. 

Two shots of tequila, a glass of wine, cranberry and vodka, Jameson on the rocks, and two mango Mojitos. Gifted myself a hangover for my 21st birthday!

Not sure if you guys care at all… 

BUT I TURN 21 ON MONDAY AND IM REALLY FUCKING EXCITED. 

I’m in such a good mood this morning. I’m having some strong black coffee and I’m watching Million Dollar Listing NY (which is really fucking addicting fyi) while curled up on the couch with my dog. I’m just really optimistic about life right now because work is going really well and I have a few things coming up to really look forward to. I’ve actually listed them in my sidebar if you care. Aaaanyway, I haven’t spoken to many of you in a while. How’s life??

I want to be back in NYC so badly. It wasn’t even just Gaga that made it incredible, it was everything. It was braving the cold and wind and rain while walking through the city and discovering little shops and restaurants in Greenwich. It was spending hours getting lost in the MET. I’ll be back soon New York, don’t miss me too much. 

Guys. She was two fucking feet away from me. She’s so beautiful and talented and human. I can’t even process tonight but ugh fuck Gaga I love you so much.

Please never ask me if you can call me, just call me. If you give me too much time to think about it I’ll come up with an excuse.

I can’t wait to fall asleep with you on the couch, only making it halfway through a movie because we drank too much wine. I can’t wait to stumble into bed together, then wake up the next morning and cook breakfast. I’d make pancakes for us and we’d drink coffee while we pick out articles in the New York Times that we find fascinating. You’ll make fun of me for doing the crossword in pen, only to search the house for whiteout 10 minutes in. Maybe we’ll make a grocery list, or have to head to work. Maybe we’ll play goofy music while we dance and clean the house. Maybe we haven’t met yet, but damn I can’t wait.

1 month out of college and I’m being considered for a salaried managerial position at my hotel… what whaaaat ;)

I wanted nothing more than for you to tell me that you’re really really happy. I didn’t care if you lied, I just didn’t want to have hope if you told me you weren’t. There goes that.

Not New Year’s Day, just January 1st.

As of late I’ve been feeling really… off balance? I think that’s the best way to put it. I was sick last week with a horrible cold, so I’m still super congested and stuffed up. I think it sort of transferred though, mentally and emotionally. My thoughts have been all over the place and I’ve been lacking motivation and optimism that usually comes really naturally to me. I think the sick thing is partially to blame, but it’s also the fact that I’ve graduated and finished my internship. I feel as if I’m starting this new year blind with no direction in the sense of my career, my love life, my family life, etc. I also had a fight with my mom this morning so that was a shitty way to start off the year (note to you all: just because in your champagne induced buzz you think it’s a good idea to send a picture of yourself with a cat on your lap and the caption being “me… getting some pussy on new years eve” to a friend, it’s probably not. Mainly because she will find it to be as hilarious as you thought it was and post it on facebook and tag you in it causing your mother to see

Anyway, all of THAT ^^^ could not have been eloquently stated had it not been for the magical human being that is Marvin. He’s a coworker of mine who is in his mid-forties I’d say and is just the most incredible person. Mind you, he listened to me ramble for five minutes until I was actually making sense, and then simply asked if I wanted a response. I realized that I didn’t necessarily need one, because being able to clearly elaborate on why I was “feeling shitty Marvin” was enough. He did however respond by telling me "Today is not New Year’s Day, it’s simply January first. It’s a day, and tomorrow is January second. Forget about the cliched American bullshit." He also told me that it’s completely normal for me to freak out post graduation, but that I should also be giving myself more credit because graduating college at 20 years old is an amazing thing. Plus, I have a job… a great one. Just because it’s not something big and fancy and managerial means nothing.

"Have patience" he said.

So I will. 

Dear all of you fuckers who convinced me to watch American Horror Story… I hate you. I’m in the middle of season two and I’m all jumpy and emotional and weirded out and can’t function normally at the moment -.- I’m a chicken shit! Why did I think watching this would be okay?! 

Things that happened in 2013 worth remembering.

Since I’m stuck in bed due to this nasty ass cold, I figured I’d take the time to reflect on my year… SO here we go. 

It was a pretty great year filled with concerts and celebrities. Remember when P!nk flew right over me during her show? Yeah me too. Also getting to see Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeroes less than a foot away from me was pretty damn amazing. Let’s not forget that Laura Prepon tweeted me and I saw Lionel Richie at an event for my job. OH and Macklemore stood on top of me at his concert. Watch out page 6, here I come. 

There were some trips too! I had the chance to see Key West on bike with some friends, I also went to the Bahamas which was amazing. Sprinkle in a couple trips to Orlando also and you can almost say I traveled! ;) 

It wasn’t a total washout year in terms of romance either. A night spent cuddling watching movies, a handful of random dates with random people, another handful of random kisses, yettttt I’m still forever alone. Life goes on. 

As far as work goes, I got promoted bitchessss! I also scored my dream internship which was the most incredible life changing experience. Oh yeah, I also graduated from college. Yay for being accomplished! 

The things I listed above are really just the factual things though. ALL of those things led to some really enlightening moments for me. This year was huge in terms of being honest with myself and those that I care about. I’d also like to think that I’m now a more humble and compassionate individual due to some really incredible people that I was lucky enough to meet throughout the year. I feel like each day that passes helps me grow more and more and I can’t wait to see what 2014 has in store for me.

PS- I can’t forget to mention YOU GUYS. To many, 1,000 followers doesn’t seem like much… but to me, holy shit! Don’t know what I did to deserve you all, especially all of you who have actually become good friends to me. So thank you. I love you all. 

Nothing screams relief like finishing this semester with straight A’s. I worked full time, took four classes, interned with my dream job, and assisted a professor all semester long. I feel like superwoman!

Guys… I have ONE little paper to write. That’s the last thing I have to do before graduating college and I can’t fucking bring myself to do it. It’s such an easy paper too! Rather than actually sit my ass down and get it done tonight, I’m scrolling through tumblr and sipping on my coffee. No discipline I’m telling you. Don’t think that this is going to change as you get closer to finishing college. It doesn’t. 

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